Ring of Fury

I did it. I made it to the first ever South Korean International Grand Prix. Okay, I make that sound far more special than it actually is, but it was a great time to a) watch Formula 1 for the first time and b) only have to travel 10 minutes in traffic from my apartment. The day before the big event I didn't think I was going to be able to go, since I didn't feel like shelling out several hundred for tickets--and some shifty Facebook free ticket scheme (not surprisingly) fell through for 90% of the people involved. On the Facebook note, I get an email three weeks ago (I'm in a Mokpo Facebook group) purporting free tickets for all the foreigners in the area. Granted I would be silly to have faith in something like this, but it turns out I couldn't get the tickets anyway because they required a foreigner ID number at the gates: this is the number that every teacher in Korea has except FBers. You have to have it to do internet banking; to use the internet at Starbucks, hence its probably the only downside of my "diplomatic" visa versus whatever everyone else gets. I guess the U.S. ambassador can't use the internet at Starbucks; that makes me feel a little bit better. Well in the end, they only gave out 1/10 of the tickets they promised, so I would have likely been stranded anyway.

Not to worry though, the week of the race my host Dad got 4 tickets in the mail from some friend and decided I could use a couple of them for the day. Here's to you Pong Kil. Anyway, come race weekend Mokpo was swamped. The track is brand new--only cleared for racing a week ago--so everything, including traffic management, was thrown together like an eskimo luau. No worries though, I got there despite meeting the first dishonest cabbie since coming to Korea. Apparently he thought every foreigner at the race knew nothing of Korea, so he 'forgot' to turn on the meter and tried to charge us thirty for the ride. I said hell no, gave him twenty for the trouble and left...he didn't fight and only gave me this pouty look so I felt satisfied with the haggling.

Alright, to the race. Racing = awesome, everything else = *insert your favorite sad korean emoticon. That didn't spoil the fun though, even if they ran out of food before I got there. That's actually another first, Korea NEVER runs out of food; you never go home hungry--except at Formula 1. Apparently we (Jing and I) had great seats. I would agree; since it was at a switchback and you could actually see the cars for a minute before the blast by at 220 mph. I got to play around with some action shots on the DSLR, always a good time, and proceed to go a little more deaf every time another car flew by. These cars are beasts. Machined and driven to perfection by the best of the best, it's always fun to see the pinnacle of any sporting genre. To be perfectly honest I don't know all that much about the sport; I know a handful of racers and the general history/purpose, but that didn't stop me from enjoying the gleaming mechanical perfection as the cars fly in, brake on a dime, and speed off before you realize you dropped a doozie in your pants. The thing about sitting at one place in any racetrack (probably the same for any racing event) is that you get to the see the same thing, over, and over, and over again. With that said, I didn't fully realize this until long after thoroughly enjoying the spectacle. The flip side is that I never would have paid W660,000 (around $600) to sit in the same place and watch the same thing over and over again. I guess you have to pay to play--but since I didn't pay I have no complaints and only the warmest feelings for Korean Formula 1, even if they ran out of food.

Educational Dancing

I got a couple extra days off this week for the 'School Festival.' At least that's the direct translation of the eventt; I might call it something more like 'High Schoolers doing K-pop dances on stage in front of old people.' In all seriousness though, it was a great time since I didn't have to teach any classes, just sit around, eat food and practice my Korean in the Gyomushil. Though I was a bit surprised to see risque dancing out of high school girls--all in front of adults and various notable personages that apparently have some connection to the school. And by risque I mean 6 girls lined up with matching 1-inch shorts doing body pumps and aerial maneuvers that banish the likes of Patrick Swayze and Jennifer Grey to Sunday School sock hops. Okay, I might exaggerate a little bit, but some of this just seemed out of place at a daytime high school event--all the more so because it was a demonstration of the 'caliber' of Jungang High School students in front of the said visitors. To top it all off they had an array of treats and students serving food and teas throughout the day. It's always kind of funny when they get all dressed up in the traditional Hanbok to serve you tea and Ddok, and then proceed to spill it everywhere when they're attempting to pour for the first time. I guess I have high standards for pouring though, since I worked in a chemistry lab for 3 years. To top it all off, they were serving Makkoli for W2,000 a pop ($2, standard price) out in front of the auditorium. Not only were teachers sitting around drinking on school property, but all the imbibing was going on during school hours while the kids danced and strutted around on stage. I mean, I'm not really surprised at something like this anymore, but it is enlightening--again and again--to see how different things are between two societies.

Sitting here now on a rainy Sunday afternoon watching Formula 1 on TV...the same Formula 1 that I went to go watch yesterday. I'll give you an update on all that here in the next couple days, I just though I'd mention how equally odd and amusing it is to watch something on TV that you can hear from the window.

The Darker Side

It's been about a week so I guess it's time I update this thing. As for the darker side, I finally managed to get sick on this side of the Earth...aside from the random delights that come with trying new foods and welcoming new bacteria. Fortunately I think it's going to be a quick one. If first came in on Saturday and I'm feeling a lot better as of Monday evening. I don't think I've ever slept quite that much in one day though--let me give a shout out to downloaded episodes of Mad Men for filling in the spare time (for those of you who haven't seen this show, watch it. Now. AMC isn't paying me to say this, but I'm open for offers if the word gets out). Anyway, I guess the random Korean medications I took couldn't have hurt. I mean, I have no idea what some of the stuff was (a bit ashamed since I'm going to medical school next year) but I was too lazy to figure out the translations and just assumed that my host mother wasn't trying to kill me...the verdict on that one comes back if I make it to the next blog post. The sickness couldn't have come at a better time though: I had Friday off for some sort of "testing," I only had to work half a day today and there's a school "festival" tomorrow--for which I should attend--followed by another round of "testing" on Wednesday that I definitely don't have to show up for. Sorry for all the quotation marks, but I use them as much for my own amusement at this point. It's just with testing and festivals and field trips and school 'let's be lazy days,' I'm pretty sure I've ended up with more days off than I actually work--I mean, I'm not complaining or anything, it's just...amusing. As for the festival, I'll try to lug the camera around tomorrow to capture the glory of Korean flag girls and stale dokboggi, even if ol' Jungang High School can't match the opulence of Keith's Jeju boys (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zpTJISyKGrA&p=FF23A0D80A471DD4&playnext=1&index=9). I expect it will be somewhere on par with the North Korean Mass games (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBWOEdy_-qM). Okay, maybe not. But a boy can dream.

Switching my train of though here...This upcoming weekend is the first Korean Formula one race--situated right here in Mokpo. Okay, not actually Mokpo, but it's like ten minutes away. Supposedly I'm getting free tickets because I'm white, or not Korean, either way you want to look at it. I kind of doubt I'll get the tickets to be honest, but you really never know around here. I can't say being...Western...gets you that many perks, but if definitely puts you in interesting situations. Like walking around this "Health Expo" on Saturday afternoon with my host mom and sister: random Korean women handing me bags of kimchi and taking my picture for who-the-hell-knows what publication. I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me. Most of all though, I can't walk ten feet outside the apartment with random kids saying hello to me. I mean, it sounds innocent enough, but with the snide little smile on their faces and the lack of any interest in engaging in conversation (that, and you've already heard it 3,459 times the previous week) it starts to seem less innocent. Don't get me wrong, I don't get angry or anything. I just stop thinking, "Oh, what a nice kid" and start wondering when the little #$%* can think of something more creative. I'm sure any other ETA reading this knows exactly what I'm talking about, so if you have any suggestions for a good comeback I'm all ears.

Taming the Beast

By beast I actually mean they mischievous high school students that I spend most of my week around, and I might have just found a way to actually control these little hooligans. For the first 6 weeks I did't use any technology in the classroom save for my Ipad on a couple occasions. Now that I have a workable project and a computer with powerpoint, I feel like I actually have something to leverage the bawdy minds of high schoolers. The past couple days I gave a lesson on American food--showing them all sorts of horrendously delicious pictures of hamburgers, steak, chicken, junk food and any other edible tranquilizer I could get my hands on. Besides giving them something that they *might* find interesting, this took the focus me for once...or at least off of listening to me. They're pretty much incapable of understanding complete sentences, let alone forming one on their own, so I think I might have finally hit their level: putting up a big picture of fried bacon on the screen and shouting "bacon" and "delicious" three or four times. Content, of course, cannot be overstated; So I'll have to keep thinking up either delicious or scandalous powerpoint topics as the year goes on. On one hand this actually takes takes a little time to put together. But it also doubles as Korean language class on my end--since I end up learning the corresponding Korean vocabulary after teaching the same class 6 times.

This past weekend was also something of an *event* on the FB agenda, so I guess I better go ahead and mention it. We had the FB 60th anniversary Gala in Seoul at the Silla Hotel. For those of you who don't know anything about the Silla Hotel--and if you're not from Korea then to be honest, you shouldn't--it's pretty much The Hotel. When you're Korean language textbook references it in practice sentences, it must be important...to Koreans citizens at least. Anyway, the whole ordeal was pretty nice, even if I wasn't blown away by the hotel itself. I mean, the place is pretty swank; I have no complaints. But I'm still not going to pay $13 for a beer at the bar when it comes in same bottle as one at the 7-Eleven. Well, once the actual event got going we were bombarded congratulatory readings (by "we" I mean the 500 people in attendance, not just the ETAs but past FBers and affiliates) and speeches about the merits of foreign experience and the history of FB. The food was delicious, multiple courses of scallops, some white fish, and tenderloin...all the more succulent when paired with the endless glass of wine that came with the ordeal. Well, not to be outdone by any of the speakers, the mass of FBers and myself were coerced into singing a song (for which we practice 35,243,098 hours during the convention): a precious little tune (see: sarcasm) only made palatable by the random drunk white guy in the middle of the room--in a sea of Korean bureaucrats and school administrators--fist pumping and screaming "YES! That was AWESOME!" at the end of the song. I don't think Mrs. Shim and the organizers planned for that one, but I was appreciative. And if that didn't make the even worthwhile, he gave me a high five in the bathroom immediately following the performance: "Dude, THANK YOU, you guys are AWESOME!" ***Here's to you random drunk white guy.

Jumping in Puddles

No, I haven't actually been jumping in puddles lately; I just though I'd use that title since I've been so perplexed by the subject of childhood. During dinner my host mom had this interesting thought while the three kids were running around acting like zombies...or retarded llamas, I'm not really sure which: something about how human energy changes over time (she explained it in Korea, but I'm pretty sure I got the gist of it). Kids never stop running around, at least until they fall flat on there faces or fall asleep after a long day. They eat a little sugar and all hell breaks loose; adults think snow is cold yet kids romp and play and till their fingers turn black and snot freezes to their upper lip. Over time this energy changes. Some time during adolescence boys stop romping in the snow and start romping around looking for girls. Play energy turns into sexual energy. As an adult, you start to care about things more. You have to use your head at work, thus all your energy turns cerebral. The last point I found pretty hilarious: old ladies (at least in Korea) never stop talking...so I guess all that cerebral energy turns into talking energy. By the time you're old, decrepit and senile...the energy is gone. To be honest I'm not really sure where I'm going with this, just that's it's an interesting point that I wanted to remember--or at least share with you.

Also on the subject of energy, the kids at school were bouncing off the walls today. I only had three classes, but it might as well have been three rounds wrestling a polar bar in a McDonald's ball pit. Usually about a quarter of the kids are sleeping, half of them are talking and pretending I don't exist while the rest are either sleeping with their eyes open or feigning interest and understanding of what I'm talking about. No so today, they were hitting and kicking (literally), throwing random objects or making strange Himalayan chanting sounds (again, I'm not kidding). One boy actually slapped me on the ass four times. What do I say to that? I'm half impressed that he had the balls to do it and genuinely confused as to why the hell he would want to. I guess it was just...the Friday routine--I haven't actually taught on a Friday in like 3 or 4 weeks, so maybe this isn't so unusual. As much as I belittle my students though, they really aren't that bad, and a few of them I actually like. One wants me to call him 'Rap Gyu.' This kids is actually a pretty good rapper, and actually freestyled a couple times for me in class. Apparently he won some kind of contest and is going to rap during the opening ceremonies of the Korean F1 Races here in the couple weeks. I mean, I'm no hip-hop connoisseur but he sounded pretty good to me.

Oh, and they've also been filming and taking pictures of me at school lately. I got a nice spread in the latest Jungang High School advertisement--"Look, we have an American!" or something like that. Today they were filming me in class and 'kindly' requested (THIS MORNING) that I use a powerpoint. I've never used a powerpoint in the classroom. The one time I tried the power was out in my corner of the building for two weeks, so a no-go there. Fortunately I had that same one on hand and I enjoyed the fifteen minute block in which the students were marginally quieter; during filming, that is. I should invite the film crew back more often; have them just stand in the corner to keep the kids quieter during my lecture.

Conference Call

Apparently every town in Korea has some special bread, history, or sacred mound of dirt...otherwise, why would people live there? Seriously though, any time you mention a particular city in Korea it's like, "Oh, they've got great bread" or "that's the best bibimbap in all of land." Mokpo is known for live octopus (apparently "out of season" right now) and some sort of eel fish. This past weekend I went to the Fall FB conference in Gyeongju, about 5 hours of bus from my neck of the woods. Gyeongju is all about the Silla dynasty tombs (random grassy knolls scattered around the city) and a few temples and castles. It was pretty cool actually, since most other "history" in Korea outside of Seoul consists of kitschy pop memorabilia and funny-looking stones masquerading as a tourist attraction (see: Mokpo Gatbawi park). I've mentioned before that, unlike American joints, Korean restaurants tend to specialize in one thing. The same applies to most of the cities in one way or another--a rejuvenating mud bath, the pear capital of the world, etc, etc. Anyway, Gyeongju's specialty is bread...this sweet little bean past filled concoction of love. I mean, they're good; delicious actually, but I think the town's economy is actually based on these little morsels since 1 out of 3 stores in the town sells nothing but bread. That must be an extremely boring place to work...there's no "what do you want,"no "how do you want that steak cooked".....just "how many."

Alright, enough of that. This past weekend's FB Conference was HIGHLY appreciated. For an event that only consisted of one day (Saturday), I got a four day weekend. That actually rolled into my school's midterm testing dates...turning the whole affair into a 6 day weekend. The conference itself was...OK. If nothing else it was nice to listen to other ETAs' funny stories, schools that have better kids than mine and distaster home stays that make me appreciate this one that much more. I may not have genius kids reading the Times in middle school, but at least my home stay siblings don't hit me and run off crying or crawl into bed with me in the middle of the night. It all evens out in the end...I guess. Well, after sharing stories and not paying attention during large group presentation, half of us hopped on a tour bus to check out the historic sites. Some of the Buddhist shrines and old temples were pretty amazing, but as with most Korean attractions, they were loaded with old ladies and little kids. This only makes me appreciate America that much more. I mean, we have our fair share of paved park trails and giant road-side hot dogs...but in pretty much any national park you can get yourself off the beaten path and live on the wild side for a couple days.

After Geyongju, I headed south to Jinju for the night to hang out with Neill and check out the "Lantern festival"....I guess Jinju must be the lantern capital of South Korea or something.
In all seriousness though, the festival was pretty impressive at night and well worth the trip. During the day we toured an old castle on the river's edge--apparently famous for a Korean geisha that pushed a Japanese general off a cliff in the 16th century. I know it sounds odd, but the whole "famous" thing is just the norm over here. To give you an idea, we get in the cab to head to the castle on Monday, tell the cabbie where to go, and then he's like "Oh, so you know the story of the geisha who"....as if the entire city it defined by this one event.

Well, during the day the festival was little more than a bunch of oversized cartoon characters floating around in the river--anything form dragon floats and Buddhist shrines to giant weightlifters and miniature sports stadiums. At night they've got them all lit up, putting on a pretty good show along side the food stalls and Korean carny' games. Yes, Korean carnies do exist. They have the typical baseball throw and bb gun shoot....mixed in with the 'eel dump' in case you ever forgot you were in Korea. In that last one, you just grab an eel out of a jar and dump it in a big trough with little rooms--whichever room it goes in you get the prize with the same number...plenty of room for interpretation there. The festival goes on all week, so anyone who's reading this over here and has the time to check it out, I highly recommend it. Over and out.